The Key to Achieving Your Goals: Focus on Your Habits
Whether you are continuing to chip away at your New Year’s Resolution or setting new goals and intentions, why does it seem like some people effortlessly reach their goals while others deeply struggle?
One major contributor is our habits. The types of habits we form and the approach we take to create new habits are critical in achieving our goals and establishing any lasting or sustainable transformation. The more consistent a habit becomes, the less deliberate effort required, making it less likely you throw in the towel.
Keys to forming a new habit:
1. Start Small. Most of us overestimate what can be accomplished in a day and underestimate what can be accomplished in a year, or over the next several years. This causes us to get in over our heads too quickly, become frustrated when our unrealistic expectations aren’t met, and give up. Pick one habit to focus on at a time, and focus on small increments to start. Try running 10 minutes a couple times a week versus 5 miles every day, or meditate for 2 minutes a day versus 30 minutes every once in awhile. Slowly build over time.
2. Schedule your new habit the same time every day or week. The more consistent you can keep your schedule, the easier it is to remember and maintain. Your brain will start to automatically associate that particular time with your new routine (i.e. maybe every Sunday evening you meal prep). It can help to anchor your new habit to an already existing habit (i.e. every morning right after you brush your teeth, sit to meditate for 5 minutes before continuing your morning routine).
3. Lay out reminders. Sometimes it’s not the habit itself that is difficult to perform, but it’s remembering to do it. Pack your workout clothes the night before. Set reminders on your phone to breathe if you’re trying to reduce stress. Stick post-it notes on your bathroom mirror or desk to keep you on track.
4. Establish a positive, immediate emotional connection. While discipline and repetition are definitely a part of solidifying a good habit, an encouraging emotional connection is key to staying motivated, especially in the beginning. Have a mini celebration each time you achieve an aspect of your new habit. It might feel a little cheesy or contrived at first, but try to find something that feels authentic to you. Say to yourself “Good work!” when you arrive at the networking event you were dragging your feet to attend. Do a little victory dance after submitting a new job application. Cheer for yourself after leaving the gym.
5. Try visualization techniques or mantras to help refocus you when motivation feels low. Another way of increasing emotional connection is through visualization or the meditation technique of a mantra. Start by clearly defining why you are pursuing your specific goal and what you ultimately want to accomplish. Then picture yourself as vividly as possible achieving your goals and how you got there. Or, repeat to yourself a phrase such as “I am strong” or “I am capable” as a reminder that you are! Try to feel a connection with these images or phrases throughout your whole mind, body, and heart.
6. Focus on your journey rather than comparing yourself to others. Be honest with yourself about where you are starting and what success looks like for you. Those you admire can certainly be used as a source of inspiration, but everyone’s path and circumstances are different and too much comparison will only lead to self-doubt, derailing you from your efforts. Remember the road to success can look very different for different people, and your story will be your very own.
7. Be prepared for hurdles, but know they will pass. Studies show that it takes on average 66 days for a habit to become automatic. There will be times that feel more difficult than others. There will be days that life happens and you’ll need to be flexible. If you miss a time or two, it does not mean you have failed. Don’t get discouraged and simply get back on track as soon as you can. It will start to feel easier over time, and remember little changes still add up to great gains in the big picture.
Most importantly, don’t give up! Things that happen or are sought after too quickly often disappear as fast as they came. Laying the groundwork with patience and diligence over time will set you up for the sustainable success and the new and improved sense of self you may be seeking.
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